The Power of No: My Journey to Protect My Peace


For the longest time, I found it difficult to say one of the smallest, yet most powerful words: “no.” It’s a simple two-letter word, yet the inability to utter it has led to significant frustration and loss in my life. Fourteen months ago, if I had simply said “no,” I would have avoided much of the stress and financial strain that I’ve since had to endure.

Looking back, it’s easy to see the moments where I allowed myself to be swayed by my empathy for others. I’ve always prided myself on being there for people, on offering a helping hand when they needed it most. But what I’ve realized is that there’s a fine line between kindness and self-sacrifice. And, unfortunately, I’ve often found myself on the wrong side of that line.

When you are empathetic, people are drawn to your willingness to help. It’s a beautiful quality, but one that can be exploited if you’re not careful. I’ve learned this the hard way. There’s a danger in giving too much of yourself—your time, energy, resources—until there’s nothing left for you. In the past, I’ve made sacrifices I thought were for the greater good, only to find myself depleted and taken advantage of. The costs of not saying “no” have been more than just financial; they’ve impacted my mental peace, my energy, and my sense of balance.

But here’s the thing: I will never stop caring for others. I will never lose the empathy that drives me to want to help. That’s who I am, and I wouldn’t change that for the world. However, going forward, the word “no” is going to be a big part of my vocabulary. And trust me, I’m going to use it unapologetically.

It doesn’t mean I’ve become less compassionate. It just means that I’m no longer willing to give when it’s my last, my breaking point. I’ve learned that there’s power in setting boundaries, in protecting yourself, and in making sure that you have something left in the tank for you.



So yes, the answer will be “no.” It will be a resounding, steadfast “no.” And though I may still feel sorry for those who ask for what I cannot give, I will not feel guilty for saying it. Because “no” is not just a refusal—it’s an affirmation that I deserve peace, stability, and respect. Saying “no” is no longer my downfall; it’s my salvation.



I wish I had learned this lesson earlier, but better late than never. Going forward, I will use my “no” to protect my yes—to ensure that when I do say “yes,” it’s because I truly can, not because I feel obligated to. I will continue to be there for people, but not at the cost of my own well-being. And for that, I make no apologies.


Stay tuned for the book because yes, this encounter will have a full chronological book with names dates etc!

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